summer 22 mini 1000 - day 3: present
Aug. 9th, 2022 09:46 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
zoomieyotwo entries for today because I’m feeling extra creative but I also have more to say… also I want to keep on schedule because I’m excited about tomorrows entry. I didn’t actually have this prompt planned, but i think its a needed one before we talk about tomorrow’s topic.
I love making titles. My notes is always full of snippets of ideas and potential titles for things. one question i asked myself recently was
this has been a recurring theme for myself. as someone who struggles with overworking, it only makes sense that this is a struggle. when i reflect, i always look back at times where i felt in the moment. the times where all of the worries fade away, where i feel fully invested in whatever is going on in my life. I love the moment when flow happens- being so deeply immersed in a project. being present manifests itself in multiple ways for me. theres times where I’m living each day and feeling that brightness im always running after. theres times when im fully focused on a project and look up and its hours later. times when i feel the runners high at the gym, or when i unrealizingly do an extra set of whatever exercise. these are all aspects of deeply focused presence for me.
i also want to talk about the kind of present where im making the conscious decision to be present. to put my phone down and block out the distractions, the worries, every stray thought that crosses my mind. the kind of presence where im microjournaling or keeping my diary streak (keeping any kind of streak really.) thats the present im wanting to cultivate more in my life.
ive always been the type that has to write out the to do list, and for a long time i was a consistent bullet journaler. my bullet journal contained everything i could need- my calendar, task lists, project ideas and sketches. i look back on my bullet journals and why i ever stopped (something to explore later perhaps?) but i also love digital planning and tracking. i had used listography last summer to keep a journal of my daily happenings and that i think is one of the best examples i have of the kind of presence i wish to cultivate. i feel so connected and immersed in my own life last summer. i had a lot going on, but it wasn’t overwhelming or draining for me at all. i look at my bullet journals and feel the same way. i think about the times that ive been good about microjournaling and keeping a diary… its all the same. its choosing to be present and aware of your life.
i frequently get stuck in a sort of cycle where i forget to live. i notice it happens around the time i start to pms and how my life seems to just derail. i always actively ask myself: “what can i do to prevent this?” i think the solution is to make external tracking systems instead of keeping it all in my head. i think that for me, being present is kind of connected with taking the time to write it all down. hm. this really just clicked for me. im kind of amazed how obvious it is when i sit and take the time to think about it (wow! being present in real time, with you here. happy for this moment between us)
what i love about the dreamwidths i follow are media check ins. i’ve been wanting to start them myself but i have a bad habit of not being able to share my thoughts out of fear of being annoying, or getting stuck in being perfect. but i love that glimpse into other peoples form of presence. one day ill start to be a bit more mindful of my media consumption. but ill get to that soon i think.
tangentially related to presence: i noticed recently that when i went to a coffee shop to enjoy the ambient coffee shop noises, i was more distracted than if i was listening to one of my playlists. sometimes my music of choice is fast paced, sometimes its instrumentals/classical/osts, sometimes its songs i just cant get enough of. it typically leans a bit more into the faced paced though. i remembered that one semester i would always go to this one computer lab after my class and work on my homework to a soundtrack of hypmic. i did college level calculus while listening to japanese rap that whole semester. i find that even if i listen to interesting music i can somehow tune it out and still focus on whatever task is in front of me. sometimes though my concentration is shot and i have to turn on something without lyrics to focus. yeah. being present and focused on whatever task at hand while still enjoying music. theres probably more to be said here likely an addendum when i find the point i was trying to make with this in the future. but i’ve lost where i was going to go with this.
i think that with all this said, im just looking to being more present in my life by actually taking the time to notice it. i know that everyone always talks about the benefits of mindfulness, so i guess im just agreeing with them. i feel like i have a bit of different spin but take of this what you will. in my original drafting, present wasn’t even a topic to consider. as i started to work on identity and reread over introduction, i kinda realized that this was an idea waiting to happen. even looking over my idea page for mini 1000, im seeing it as a subsection in a different piece that was going to be focused on goals (midpoint theory). I think that these two ideas are related and similar but deserve the space to shine on their own.
referring back to the question thats been floating in my mind- what does it mean to be present? i want to kinda outline how i will be more present:
cultivating presence
1. record keeping - the intentional act of choosing to write down what happens
2. setting aside distractions - choosing to be involved in whats going on by not looking at my phone, and making the conscious decision to not let my thoughts wander. listening with intent
3. investing wisely - much of my frustration comes from doing things that aren’t serving me. related again to setting aside distractions- what would be a better use of my attention, energy time?
4. choosing to act - sometimes i forget to live. being intentional and again choosing to have fun.
5. general awareness - self explanatory. being aware is the first step right?
these aren’t hard and fast rules, but more notes on the ways that ive felt more present and ground in my life in the past. also just good general rules to avoid wasting time on dumb stuff and choosing to embrace the good things that matter.
word count: 1,205
reading time: 4 minutes
I love making titles. My notes is always full of snippets of ideas and potential titles for things. one question i asked myself recently was
“what does it mean to be present?“
this has been a recurring theme for myself. as someone who struggles with overworking, it only makes sense that this is a struggle. when i reflect, i always look back at times where i felt in the moment. the times where all of the worries fade away, where i feel fully invested in whatever is going on in my life. I love the moment when flow happens- being so deeply immersed in a project. being present manifests itself in multiple ways for me. theres times where I’m living each day and feeling that brightness im always running after. theres times when im fully focused on a project and look up and its hours later. times when i feel the runners high at the gym, or when i unrealizingly do an extra set of whatever exercise. these are all aspects of deeply focused presence for me.
i also want to talk about the kind of present where im making the conscious decision to be present. to put my phone down and block out the distractions, the worries, every stray thought that crosses my mind. the kind of presence where im microjournaling or keeping my diary streak (keeping any kind of streak really.) thats the present im wanting to cultivate more in my life.
ive always been the type that has to write out the to do list, and for a long time i was a consistent bullet journaler. my bullet journal contained everything i could need- my calendar, task lists, project ideas and sketches. i look back on my bullet journals and why i ever stopped (something to explore later perhaps?) but i also love digital planning and tracking. i had used listography last summer to keep a journal of my daily happenings and that i think is one of the best examples i have of the kind of presence i wish to cultivate. i feel so connected and immersed in my own life last summer. i had a lot going on, but it wasn’t overwhelming or draining for me at all. i look at my bullet journals and feel the same way. i think about the times that ive been good about microjournaling and keeping a diary… its all the same. its choosing to be present and aware of your life.
i frequently get stuck in a sort of cycle where i forget to live. i notice it happens around the time i start to pms and how my life seems to just derail. i always actively ask myself: “what can i do to prevent this?” i think the solution is to make external tracking systems instead of keeping it all in my head. i think that for me, being present is kind of connected with taking the time to write it all down. hm. this really just clicked for me. im kind of amazed how obvious it is when i sit and take the time to think about it (wow! being present in real time, with you here. happy for this moment between us)
what i love about the dreamwidths i follow are media check ins. i’ve been wanting to start them myself but i have a bad habit of not being able to share my thoughts out of fear of being annoying, or getting stuck in being perfect. but i love that glimpse into other peoples form of presence. one day ill start to be a bit more mindful of my media consumption. but ill get to that soon i think.
tangentially related to presence: i noticed recently that when i went to a coffee shop to enjoy the ambient coffee shop noises, i was more distracted than if i was listening to one of my playlists. sometimes my music of choice is fast paced, sometimes its instrumentals/classical/osts, sometimes its songs i just cant get enough of. it typically leans a bit more into the faced paced though. i remembered that one semester i would always go to this one computer lab after my class and work on my homework to a soundtrack of hypmic. i did college level calculus while listening to japanese rap that whole semester. i find that even if i listen to interesting music i can somehow tune it out and still focus on whatever task is in front of me. sometimes though my concentration is shot and i have to turn on something without lyrics to focus. yeah. being present and focused on whatever task at hand while still enjoying music. theres probably more to be said here likely an addendum when i find the point i was trying to make with this in the future. but i’ve lost where i was going to go with this.
i think that with all this said, im just looking to being more present in my life by actually taking the time to notice it. i know that everyone always talks about the benefits of mindfulness, so i guess im just agreeing with them. i feel like i have a bit of different spin but take of this what you will. in my original drafting, present wasn’t even a topic to consider. as i started to work on identity and reread over introduction, i kinda realized that this was an idea waiting to happen. even looking over my idea page for mini 1000, im seeing it as a subsection in a different piece that was going to be focused on goals (midpoint theory). I think that these two ideas are related and similar but deserve the space to shine on their own.
referring back to the question thats been floating in my mind- what does it mean to be present? i want to kinda outline how i will be more present:
cultivating presence
1. record keeping - the intentional act of choosing to write down what happens
2. setting aside distractions - choosing to be involved in whats going on by not looking at my phone, and making the conscious decision to not let my thoughts wander. listening with intent
3. investing wisely - much of my frustration comes from doing things that aren’t serving me. related again to setting aside distractions- what would be a better use of my attention, energy time?
4. choosing to act - sometimes i forget to live. being intentional and again choosing to have fun.
5. general awareness - self explanatory. being aware is the first step right?
these aren’t hard and fast rules, but more notes on the ways that ive felt more present and ground in my life in the past. also just good general rules to avoid wasting time on dumb stuff and choosing to embrace the good things that matter.
word count: 1,205
reading time: 4 minutes
